GI Joe lurches towards live-action filmdom (i.e. G.I. Joe live action)

[CoryHolmes]

You might wanna check out the teaser trailer for GI Joe Resolute. It'll be an online cartoon, but it looks to be more promising and more up your alley.

Bullets instead of lasers. And the sweet, sweet release of Cobra Troopers dying. Not parachuting out of FANGs, or running away from enemy laser fire, but getting shot, slashed, and cut the f*ck up by a geniune commando/ninja.

... link?

[Roy Focker]

I almost forgot about Resolute. The most serious Joe cartoon is just a short internet film. Would have been nice if the movie took this approach.

[chowyunskinny]

k, just got through streaming "The Lookout" on XBL Netflix

Wanted to check it out because it got an 87 on rottentomatoes and to see what kind of acting chops that Joseph Gordon Levitt kid (Cobra Commander) has

It was an ok movie. Think shades of Memento crossed with a bank heist. Isla Fisher is in it too which was a plus. As for his acting, he's pretty much a young Keanu Reeves.

[VFTF1]

Some men are ass-men, some are breast-men, and some are even foot-men. I like hair.

Well - just for the record - I respect where you're coming from, since I'm an ass-hair man. No. Wait. That's sounds bad. Not "ass-hair" as in ...you know...hairy ass...but as in ass/hair. As in I like ass but hair is also important- but not on the ass but on the head...but not in the gay sense of head but in the literal sense of head - the one on the shoulders...

Damn it! It's so hard to be coherent. But yeah - hair is important and getting the hair right is important.

I don't care about the plot of GI Joe, like David said - it's not like they have Oscar material in terms of actors or cast - but - they DO need to make sure the ladies are sexy, and that includes making sure their hair is good.

This movie is going to be so bad, that we might as well look at the bright side and hope for some good Baroness ass shots - sadly, we can't hope for any good Scarlet hair shots - because the dye color is off.

Pete

[anime52k8]

I don't care about the plot of GI Joe, like David said - it's not like they have Oscar material in terms of actors or cast - but - they DO need to make sure the ladies are sexy, and that includes making sure their hair is good.

This movie is going to be so bad, that we might as well look at the bright side and hope for some good Baroness ass shots - sadly, we can't hope for any good Scarlet hair shots - because the dye color is off.

Pete

I think we need to worry about more important things tan the color of someones hair, like how Baroness' has a distinct lack of exposed boobage to her outfit. also I'm bothered by the fact Scarlet has a skin tight suit with "armor" conveniently contoured to the shape of her tits, but she doesn't have High heeled boots? fail.

I think that this movie will only be good if there's a lot of Cleavage going on that were just not seeing yet.

[Mog]

... link?

Best I could find.

Consider your anti-ninja Snake Eyes stand though, I should warn you: SE pretty much uses only edged-weapon whoop-ass in this teaser.

But me still likey!

[Scream Man]

blah blah blah Im being a d!ck for no real reason

Sorry, thats all i read. did u say something important?

i kinda dug it. Im not sure how i feel about BATS, coz i never liked them, but otherwise it was pretty cool.

[VFTF1]

I think we need to worry about more important things tan the color of someones hair, like how Baroness' has a distinct lack of exposed boobage to her outfit. also I'm bothered by the fact Scarlet has a skin tight suit with "armor" conveniently contoured to the shape of her tits, but she doesn't have High heeled boots? fail.

I think that this movie will only be good if there's a lot of Cleavage going on that were just not seeing yet.

You're right to stress the boobage, but I think David was just making the point that if the hair's all wrong, then no amount of boobage can save the day.

Look at Britney Spears...

Too have bad hair and still get good marks for boobage, you have to have eitehr a beautiful or unique face (think Sigorney Weaver).

In any event - no sense getting antagonized at one another and dividing into pro-boob and pro-hair lobbies - we need to think wholistically here.

But yeah - it looks like discussing any OTHER aspect of this movie isn't going to be worth while

Pete

[Ladic]

not fan made

[Roy Focker]

Only one of those four who might looks like their character is Zartan but he's not in make up or costume. Sorry and if you don't know already The Doctor is Cobra Commander. I think French Stewart is under that Viper mask.

Don't forget last years Sideshow Superbowl commercial for the 12 inch Joes. That was a pretty badass commercial with the live action models in the correct costumes.

[David Hingtgen]

I've heard of that commercial but never found it, even when it was "new" and actively discussed. Anyone got a copy/link?

And I might interject a comment---with Scarlett's armor, it's so "molded and padded" that frankly, they could stick an anoxeric chick inside, and you wouldn't know---the silhouette would be the same. So really, the shape you're seeing is just as fake as the hair. (from some angles) (it's along the lines of all those armored cosplayers you see with D-cup molded breast plates, when you know they are NOT filling it out inside their costume)

At least with the Baroness---what you see is real, pretty much.

[Shin Densetsu Kai 7.0]

i kinda dug it. Im not sure how i feel about BATS, coz i never liked them, but otherwise it was pretty cool.

I don't think the BATS were in the trailer, not even sure if they will be in the movie.

And I might interject a comment---with Scarlett's armor, it's so "molded and padded" that frankly, they could stick an anoxeric chick inside, and you wouldn't know---the silhouette would be the same. So really, the shape you're seeing is just as fake as the hair. (from some angles)

I've seen her out of costume, in plain clothes. She has a nice bust. So the costume doesn't do any "enhancing" to her physique. She's actually more voluptuous than Sienna Miller(who has a more slender frame).

High-Res Screen Caps

Movie Site Updated:HD Trailer Downloads, wallpapers & more

[Shin Densetsu Kai 7.0]

I almost forgot about Resolute. The most serious Joe cartoon is just a short internet film. Would have been nice if the movie took this approach.

I can agree with that.

I think that this movie will only be good if there's a lot of Cleavage going on that were just not seeing yet.

From what Dennis Quaid said, there will be a lot of cleavage.

I don't care about the plot of GI Joe, like David said - it's not like they have Oscar material in terms of actors or cast - but - they DO need to make sure the ladies are sexy, and that includes making sure their hair is good.

I care more about the story having substance, being good, and having good direction. Also hoping that Storm Shadow does have some nobility and heroic qualities about him, despite being a Cobra in the movie. I'm also interested in where they are taking the movie with regards to Cobra Commander, and hope he looks awesome(from what Di Bonaventura and others have said, it doesn't seem like he will have the iconic look of Cobra Commander). I hope it is nothing like how the US Godzilla looked a TON different than the Japanese one.

[alfye]

I think the only good thing that we´ll see in this film is the fight between Snake and Shadow... hope to be wrong...

[David Hingtgen]

Yeah, I know Rachel Nichols is curvy/hot/more so than Sienna Miller. However, I don't think she's AS nice as the costume's molding implies. (even Jeri Ryan doesn't quite have 7 of 9's shape--ever seen what she had to wear underneath?)

(honestly I think it'd have been better if Sienna and Rachel swapped roles--Baroness has more of a need of curves than Scarlett IMHO--if you're going to dye both of them and are going with totally fakey red, then it doesn't matter what their natural color is--so might as well try to match physique)

[Roy Focker]

Here's that sideshow commerical

[CoryHolmes]

Best I could find.

Consider your anti-ninja Snake Eyes stand though, I should warn you: SE pretty much uses only edged-weapon whoop-ass in this teaser.

But me still likey!

Thanks for the link.

As for SE... he was better as a skilled commando, someone who used guns and blades and bare fists. Skilled in the martial arts I can go for, but once he became a ninja was just the shark-jumping moment and the first in a very long spiral of character derailment, IMHO. Super Seekret Ninja Skillz is the realm of C+/B- grade territory.

Did anyone watch the CGI GI Joe short film that came out with the toys a few years back? I thought that one was pretty nifty (even with Ninja-Snakes...)

[David Hingtgen]

Was that the one where the casting director apparently thought "Beach Head" meant something quite different and he was a "gnarly surfer dude" voice-wise?

[Shin Densetsu Kai 7.0]

Was that the one where the casting director apparently thought "Beach Head" meant something quite different and he was a "gnarly surfer dude" voice-wise?

Those movies were terrible.

[azrael]

Thanks for the link.

HD versions:

http://www.superherohype.com/news/gijoenews.php?id=8032

You want 480p, 720p or 1080p?

[anime52k8]

Best I could find.

Consider your anti-ninja Snake Eyes stand though, I should warn you: SE pretty much uses only edged-weapon whoop-ass in this teaser.

But me still likey!

that was cool, I would like to know more.

[VFTF1]

Well - truth be told, I've always loved Cobra Commander. If they made GI Joe the movie be about an out of work grocery store clerk who gets a job in a used car lot where he catches the idea to form Cobra and then gets into a car accident with Snake Eyes' relatives, builds Springfield, populates it with...

Well - you get the point.

I loved Marvel comics take on Cobra Commander.

I think the only character that should be "international" in this is Destro - since he always was. But generally speaking... I do worry that the "nuclear weapon" plot is just wacko.

I mean - if you think about it - Cobra, as an organization, likely had tons of nuclear weapons. I mean, look at their army. They weren't really "terrorists" in the sense of these 4th generation non-state actors running around in pajamas with cocktail molotovs and IEDs. These guys have an airforce, a navy, and things like the Terror-Drone.

For a bunch of "terrorists" - they were very hierarchical, structured and symmetrical in the way that they operated. Little wonder that, in the comics, the Nation of Cobra was a legal entity and they got Cobra Island up and running.

And in fact- if you really think about it - if your goal is territorial domination and the expansion of power, then this is pretty much the blue-print you would follow.

I guess I'm wondering what goal Cobra would have. Why would they threaten to blow cities up and all that? What do they want?

ONE-MILION DOLLARS!!! ?

(Austin Powers moment)...

Sadly, given what has been shown - I get the feeling this is all going to suck. Generic Cobra soldiers will be all over the place, and Cobra itself will be a sad caricature of a "terrorist organization."

I dunno.

They could AT LEAST make GI Joe at the same level as James Bond movies are on the whole (with some exceptions).

Sure, Ian Flemmings novels, and the movies, had their eccentricities and sometimes verged on the ridiculous (Pierce Brosnan's Bond was particularly idiotic IMO - almost as if they mistakened Austin Powers FOR James Bond rather than as a parody of it), but overall - they were exciting, enjoyable spy movies.

GI Joe COULD potentially live up to that and be enjoyable, exciting adventure/commando/paramilitary style type of movie.

But I fear it'll be Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time on Crack mixed with Steroids.

Pete

[Shin Densetsu Kai 7.0]

Sadly, given what has been shown - I get the feeling this is all going to suck. Generic Cobra soldiers will be all over the place, and Cobra itself will be a sad caricature of a "terrorist organization."

This movie is about how Cobra is formed. Cobra does not exist in the beginning. This is a reimagined story.

[Mercurial Morpheus]

I have to say that I'm liking what I've seen so far. The Superad impressed me more than ROTF's did. Glad to see Baroness keeping her glasses as the only pictures I'd seen so far only showed her with shades. Though, as someone that likes hair too, especially redheads, I'll have to look closer at Scarlett to see where Dave's coming from.

It probably won't be great, but it definitely looks a lot better than most of the adaptations coming our way.

[Mr March]

Ouch! This movie looks like all kinds of epic fail. I blame EXO

Seriously, that trailer is an ADHD nightmare and a minute long documentary of Hollywood cliches. And what's up with the lifted-from-X-Men set design and cinematography? Stephen Sommers wants to be Bryan Singer so bad he should just come out of the closest.

Sorry Joe, but nostalgia can't save you from the evil clutches of the sinister suits from Paramount Pictures.

Edited February 3, 2009 by Mr March

[Agent ONE]

Storm Shadow.. Snake Eyes

Lets hear it for the Ninjas:

NINJAS!!!!

Edited February 4, 2009 by Agent ONE

[Mog]

Excuse me while I go into full nerd mode :

Well - truth be told, I've always loved Cobra Commander. If they made GI Joe the movie be about an out of work grocery store clerk who gets a job in a used car lot where he catches the idea to form Cobra and then gets into a car accident with Snake Eyes' relatives, builds Springfield, populates it with...

Well - you get the point.

I loved Marvel comics take on Cobra Commander.

Wasn't CC's brother the one who's business or halfway house got burned down, got denied the insurance proceeds, became a drunk, and then caused the accident that killed Snake Eyes' parents and sister and not Cobra Commander himself?

The Commander was definitely a used car salesman though.

As I said before, I'd rather have CC portrayed as a charismatic orator who can sway hordes of people, like a twisted version of MLK or Winston Churchill.

So, yeah, I'm with you on them using Marvel's take on Cobra Commander as a starting basis.

I got nothing against the actor, but I just don't see the kid from 3rd Rock from the Sun pulling off that kind of gravitas.

They could AT LEAST make GI Joe at the same level as James Bond movies are on the whole (with some exceptions).

Sure, Ian Flemmings novels, and the movies, had their eccentricities and sometimes verged on the ridiculous (Pierce Brosnan's Bond was particularly idiotic IMO - almost as if they mistakened Austin Powers FOR James Bond rather than as a parody of it), but overall - they were exciting, enjoyable spy movies.

GI Joe COULD potentially live up to that and be enjoyable, exciting adventure/commando/paramilitary style type of movie.

No thanks. I'd rather have a strong emphasis on teamwork and strategy (kinda like was hinted at here and there in MI3) with some Band of Brothers camaraderie and military strategy mixed in.

I'm just gonna go into this movie thinking its a bastardized version of the much better comic book storyline. If it actually turns out better than that, then I'll be mildly pleased.

[Scream Man]

The trick is making it somewhere between a military piece and something fantastical. i mena the Joes ARE more than just soldiers, and the Cobras SHOULD be over the tp. The whole THING is over the top!

[Memphis Egyptologist]

Wasn't CC's brother the one who's business or halfway house got burned down, got denied the insurance proceeds, became a drunk, and then caused the accident that killed Snake Eyes' parents and sister and not Cobra Commander himself?

The Commander was definitely a used car salesman though.

Yup, in the comics, CC's brother was the person who caused the wreck that killed Snake Eyes' family. CC's brother had started drinking heavily and was DUI when the accident occured. CC wanted to blame someone for the wreck other than his brother's own actions, so he wanted to take out revenge on Snake Eyes, which led CC to bring in Zartan and Firefly as assassins.

[anime52k8]

As I said before, I'd rather have CC portrayed as a charismatic orator who can sway hordes of people, like a twisted version of MLK or Winston Churchill.

so, basically Hitler?

[Agent ONE]

Cobra is a terror organization. I think CC should be modeled after Bin Ladin.

[David Hingtgen]

so, basically Hitler?

They may be a bit cliche and over the top, but I always felt the comics that made the most direct "CC to Hitler" comparisons were the best portrayal of CC and how he keeps himself in power and gathers followers.

[Mog]

so, basically Hitler?

C'mon now, that's the kind of crap I'd expect from a Hollywood writer and not one of my fellow MW'ers.

As DH pointed out, a Hitler-like portrayal would just be too cliche.

I'd rather have a CC who's words are far more effective and deadlier than any gun could be. A person who could just quietly talk to the soldier guarding his prison cell, eventually get him to open the cell door, and side with Cobra.

I don't want a cardboard, cookie-cutter bad guy. Like the Joker in The Dark Knight, I want a Cobra Commander who is a formidable opponent, a perfect foil to the Joes.

I want a CC who sees the average American getting fed up and pissed off with all these $700 billion bailouts, these $800 billion "stimulus packages," rising prices for gas, CFO's still getting huge bonuses and severance packages, and the same old political bullsh*t. And I want to see this CC coolly, calmly, and with a subtle reserve convince these angry and frustrated Americans to join his cause.

I find these kind of villians far more interesting. The ones who you can almost, almost side with (except for the whole fact that they have zero regard for who they kill and go about implementing their agenda in an absolutely wrong way).

[VFTF1]

Yeah - I agree with Mog. Cobra Commander can't be "Hitler" because his oratory isn't the kind of oratory that sways mass crowds - it's the type of talk that sways individuals. He's not the kind of guy who gets up in front of hundreds of people and delivers a speech. He IS the kind of guy who convinces people - one by one - to join his cause.

He also can't be "like Bin Laden" - with all due respect to Agent One.

Why?

Because terrorism is always just a method - it can be used by states as well as not state actors. In Bin Laden's case, it is used in pursuit of a twisted religious ideology (that has nothing to do with true Moslem religion - thus the twisted part) AND in Bin Laden's case there is the unfortunate fact that he was, just like the majority of Oceana's current Enemies, an Ally in the 1980s when we cheered him and his buddies on against the Soviets. Cobra is the type of organization that would NEVER buddy up with the government (at best it MIGHT bribe some government officials - but it would never get visits from the SecDef offering weapons and shaking hands...like another now demised former friend/current evil enemy of Oceana...

Also - Cobra doesn't use Suicide Bombers and has no "go blow yourself up and go to heavan" policy. Nor does it - like Hitler - have a "build death camps and exterminate races we don't like" policy.

It is more like Mog says - it is a uniquely American organization which eats off of resentment (often legitamite resentment) in the USA and turns it into anger and hatred for its' own benefit and the benefit of the leaders of Cobra. Of course all terrorist organizations do this to some extent - they feed off of legitamite grievences and exploit people who are weak and powerless ...

But - I guess all this comes down to one thing:

GI Joe SHOULD BE "A Real American Hero" - it should be about Americans fighting American bred terrorists within a uniquely American context.

Making GI Joe "international" is like making an "international Western"

People don't have to like GI Joe as a Real American Hero - they can say it's provincial and US-centric etc etc etc - but so what?

Why can't there be one cartoon out of the huge amount of different animated stories - which is more American than others?

I understand the need to give it global appeal - but really - if you look at what has mass appeal - then it is NOT watered down silly "global" stuff - instead - it is regional, unique stuff from different parts of the world with a unique culture that is interesting to everyone else because it's not something found in their backyard.

Internationalizing GI Joe will turn out just as badly as Americanizing Macross into Robotech....

On the other hand - I do grant that GI Joe is actually a hell of a difficult.

And yeah - Mog is right about CC. Just to be clear - I have always had a pretty shallow interest in GI Joe so unlike Transformers - my comments on this subject will probably have more holes in it than swiss cheese.

Pete

[PetarB]

I really knew little about GI Joe, except that they are toys I see in the kids section that look like the kind of thing I would have played with.

But after seeing this trailer, I know I'll be in the ticket queue. It looks like a lot of fun!

For the film makers, that's what they want. They know the fanbase will go and see it, even if they don't like what they see, it will be watched out of curiosity. Its the people outside the fanbase they want. And with me, they've succeeded.

And I'm all for plenty of boobage!