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FURIOUS OVER NEW CONAN (Conan the Barbarian remake)


Agent ONE

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Yeah, but can that guy act?

Seriously, if this director had any sense, he'd ask you nicely if you'd be the new Conan instead of casting this tool. But then again, this is the dude who directed Pathfinder, so...

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I don't mind the choice. True barbarians weren't as ripped as Arnie nor any candidate for the World's Strongest Man. All those muscles are actually a detriment for sword swinging (hell Arnie had problems weilding that sword in the first movie).

Edited by Wanzerfan
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* DOUSHEBAG ALERT *

The word barbarian originated in the ancient Greek city states as a means to describe their Persian adversaries. Because the Greeks were unfamiliar with the Persian language, it supposedly sounded like "bar bar bar" to them, hence the word barbarian was born.

* THIS HAS BEEN A PUBLIC SERVICE DOUSHEBAG ANNOUNCEMENT!@ *

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I don't mind the choice. True barbarians weren't as ripped as Arnie nor any candidate for the World's Strongest Man. All those muscles are actually a detriment for sword swinging (hell Arnie had problems weilding that sword in the first movie).

Yeah, but it's not a movie about any random barbarian... It's CONAN. There's a look attached to the character. That's like casting a fat bald Superman because not all men that are super are brunette and fit.

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I think Arnie was perfect as Conan for the 80's where everything was over the top and you had a Conan that was unrealistically, far superior physically to everybody else look to give him that "Super Hero" ideal. But if anyone's that actually read the Conan novels or read the comics, Conan has been depicted as a slim fighter by Windsor-Smith to a musclebound tank by Jusko and Busceama. The actor chosen is actually a half decent actor in that badass acting way and given enough time he could easily pack on 10-20 pounds of weight to bulk up although he wouldn't need much since he is a decent sized guy now. But I think the days of over muscled guys who can't even reach around to wipe their own butts is gone, I think the biggest actor physically that has any star power now is the Rock and even he's starting lean up.

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* DOUSHEBAG ALERT *

The word barbarian originated in the ancient Greek city states as a means to describe their Persian adversaries. Because the Greeks were unfamiliar with the Persian language, it supposedly sounded like "bar bar bar" to them, hence the word barbarian was born.

* THIS HAS BEEN A PUBLIC SERVICE DOUSHEBAG ANNOUNCEMENT!@ *

Actually, "barbarian" didn't just refer to the Persians. It referred to anyone who was non-Greek, including Egyptians, Phoenicians, Etruscans, etc.

And "douchebag" is spelled with a "c".

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The chosen actor is a pretty big guy. I believe he's about 6'4. He's definately alot more athletic looking than any of the other usual fan choices. I think he is a good choice. He does kinda remind me of the character from the comic book.

Besides the whole steroid look is so WWE. You can see that several times a week on TV.

Edited by Golden Arms
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IMO Mariusz would make a much better Conan villain. Its the hero who most always be the underdog overcoming challenges and obstacles. With the biggest buffest guy as the hero their isn't anyone of a threat that can realistically challenge him on a one on one fight. Remember just how ridiculous it was to have lean little Steven Brand be this overwhelming physical threat to the Rock in the Scorpian King movie?

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I think Arnie was perfect as Conan for the 80's where everything was over the top and you had a Conan that was unrealistically, far superior physically to everybody else look to give him that "Super Hero" ideal. But if anyone's that actually read the Conan novels or read the comics, Conan has been depicted as a slim fighter by Windsor-Smith to a musclebound tank by Jusko and Busceama. The actor chosen is actually a half decent actor in that badass acting way and given enough time he could easily pack on 10-20 pounds of weight to bulk up although he wouldn't need much since he is a decent sized guy now. But I think the days of over muscled guys who can't even reach around to wipe their own butts is gone, I think the biggest actor physically that has any star power now is the Rock and even he's starting lean up.
Here's an idea: why not depict Conan in the way Robert E. Howard described him?
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Hmm... let's see, how is a European guy probably with minimal English language skills and no acting experience going to star in a mov.... never mind.

Thanks for catching yourself...

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Just so you all know, I'm still in shape.. Took this just now:

I would SO make a better Conan than this twerp. I also care.

post-204-1264239388_thumb.jpg

Edited by Agent ONE
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I like my Conan stories over-the-top. Not metrosexual hippy.

Bring back the muscle slabs!

At the rate Hollywood is selling-out, next we are gonna have some long fringed pretty boy Conan the Vampire to cater to the teenage girls.

I'm gonna be joining A1 on the rooftop with my crate of Molotovs.

Edited by Retracting Head Ter Ter
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