Jolly Rogers Posted April 29, 2005 Share Posted April 29, 2005 Keep refreshing the page to see new facts ...and now a random fact about Vin Diesel: Vin Diesel was the person screaming when Boba Fett died. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dat Pinche Haro! Posted April 29, 2005 Share Posted April 29, 2005 sad thing is...it's all true jk :P Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gaijin Posted April 29, 2005 Share Posted April 29, 2005 Some of those are pretty darn funny. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Legend of TSXer Posted April 29, 2005 Share Posted April 29, 2005 (edited) Dam these are funny! "He holds the world speed record for jet-turtle, 213mph, which he set on June 18th, 1998 at the Bonneville Salt Flats on the back of a Carolina Snapping Turtle wearing rollerskates with 6 JATO rockets strapped to his back." hahaha what! "The Legend of Zelda is based on the adventures of Vin Diesel battling Adolph Hitler and the Nazis in World War 2." Edited April 29, 2005 by Legend of TSXer Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zeo-mare Posted April 29, 2005 Share Posted April 29, 2005 where do you guys find this stuff anyhow. do you just search the internet all day looking for strange things Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mercurial Morpheus Posted April 29, 2005 Share Posted April 29, 2005 I second the above comment. Funny stuff indeed. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Grayson72 Posted April 29, 2005 Share Posted April 29, 2005 Some of these are totally funny, this one's my favorite "The Ebola virus never actually existed. That's just what happens to your body naturally after Vin Diesel socks you good in the breadbasket. " Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wes Posted April 29, 2005 Share Posted April 29, 2005 (edited) My fav. "There is no emoticon for the way Vin Diesel feels. " "Vin Diesel will bury us all. " "Vin Diesel was able to watch all of Contact. " "Vin Diese is neither left or right handed, he's middle. " "Vin Diesel plays "The King" in Burger King's Wake Up With The King TV commercials. He is paid in Angus beef. " Ah Ha! So it's him! "Vin Diesel killed Kenny. He is a bastard. " Edited April 29, 2005 by Wes Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zentrandude Posted April 29, 2005 Share Posted April 29, 2005 (edited) what the? Vin Diesel eats coal, shits diamonds, and then sells the diamonds to buy more coal. edit: heh got it to repeat. it said hes alcy consumption was greater than the sewage of maryland twice. my frav so far is The movie The Chronicles of Riddick is actually a heavily altered version of a piece of Megaman X3 fanfiction Vin Diesel wrote called "Mavericks On Tour," in which the eight bosses from the game formed a rock band and played around the world. The character of Riddick is based on Crush Crawfish. Edited April 29, 2005 by Zentrandude Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pat Payne Posted April 30, 2005 Share Posted April 30, 2005 Vin Diesel was behind Franz Ferdinand's assassination in June 1914, thus starting World War 1. He claims it on "having a shitty morning". Vin Diesel was responsible for the assassination of Archduke Ferdinand. It happened because nobody came to his fifteen millionth birthday party. So, which was it? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DarkPhoenix Posted April 30, 2005 Share Posted April 30, 2005 (edited) Vin Diesel was behind Franz Ferdinand's assassination in June 1914, thus starting World War 1. He claims it on "having a shitty morning". Vin Diesel was responsible for the assassination of Archduke Ferdinand. It happened because nobody came to his fifteen millionth birthday party. So, which was it? He was having a shitty morning because no one came to his birthday party. Duh. Edited April 30, 2005 by DarkPhoenix Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pat Payne Posted April 30, 2005 Share Posted April 30, 2005 (edited) A very elegant answer, Dark Phoenix. Here's one of my own -- (I'd send it, but I don't trust the e-mail address. I've got a remarkable run of no spam in my box ) "Contrary to popular belief, the man with an arrow in his eye on the Bayeux Tapestry is not King Harold of England. It is actually Vin Diesel. What the tapestry doesn't show is that after pulling the arrow out, he casually flung it and skewered three Norman knights like a massive shishkebab, and then took the throne of England for himself. William the Conquerer only won England from Vin in a game of high-stakes poker on ESPN." Edited April 30, 2005 by Pat Payne Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DarkPhoenix Posted April 30, 2005 Share Posted April 30, 2005 Contrary to what historians want you to believe the atomic bombs that were dropped on Hiroshima and Nagasaki were not actually bombs at all, they were actually Vin Diesel's orgasms. Vin has not had sex since, and may god help us all if he ever does. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wes Posted April 30, 2005 Share Posted April 30, 2005 Contrary to what historians want you to believe the atomic bombs that were dropped on Hiroshima and Nagasaki were not actually bombs at all, they were actually Vin Diesel's orgasms. Vin has not had sex since, and may god help us all if he ever does. Actually, I just heard he did it another way: "Vin Diesel caused the nuclear explosion at Hiroshima, just by pointing to Japan on a combination globe/pencil sharpener. " Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JB0 Posted April 30, 2005 Share Posted April 30, 2005 " Vin Diesel is the only person to ever achieve a negative ping. " Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Flaming Guantlet Posted April 30, 2005 Share Posted April 30, 2005 (edited) These ones I like. " Little puppies, kittens, and the French will not go near him." " Vin Diesel told Admiral Ackbar about the "Trap"." "When Vin Diesel wishes to mail a letter, he forces it down the throat of the nearest housepet, then hurls the animal in the direction of the recipient's house." "When Vin Diesel begins work on a new film project, he bludgeons a hobo to death with a hammer for good luck. For even better luck, he devours the corpse. For the best luck possible, he throws the bones at school children during recess." "The movie The Chronicles of Riddick is actually a heavily altered version of a piece of Megaman X3 fanfiction Vin Diesel wrote called "Mavericks On Tour," in which the eight bosses from the game formed a rock band and played around the world. The character of Riddick is based on Crush Crawfish." "Vin Diesel has won the international potato sack skateboarding consecutively for the last 7 years, stealing the crown from the previous holder, Tom selleck. In 1998, Vin pioneered the 'inverted tater bag head back flip', which involves removing the sack and placing it over your head, while simultaneously standing on your head on the board and back flipping, a move that was taught to him by his master, Mr. Selleck, who could not actually complete the manuver himself. Selleck was so crushed that his apprentice had finally reached a level higher than himself that he swore never to potatosack skateboard again, and is now the leader of an anti potatosack skateboarding cult in Northwest Belgium." Edited April 30, 2005 by Flaming Guantlet Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sephiroth Posted April 30, 2005 Share Posted April 30, 2005 (edited) Some of my faves: "Is the actual creator of Calvin and Hobbes. He is secretly going around the country at night dressed as a ninja killing anyone who has one of those "peeing Calvin" stickers on their car." "Vin Diesel speaks in THX certified sound." "Vin Diesel has solved all of history's greatest problems with ho-slappings and his unique ability to ejaculate anti-matter." "Vin Diesel invented the Accordion, but it was originally meant to be, solely, a murder weapon. It wasnt until 1913 that it began being used as an instrument. Vin has accepted this and has no bitter feelings towards the French." "Vin Diesel was the real creator of Spawn, not Todd McFarlane. In fact, Vin Diesel IS Spawn, and using his awesome hell powers, he thought up the greatest sci-fi movies ever, including Alien, Blade Runner, and Terminator. He also starred in all of them, as both the main characters and as the monsters, and his favorite roles were those of Newt, the Alien Queen, Pris, and John Connor, while simultaneously impregnating all the supposed people who played the above-mentioned roles, and causing all of them to give birth to their own grandchildren, because his semen is really Red Bull energy drink." Edited April 30, 2005 by Sephiroth Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NERV Posted April 30, 2005 Share Posted April 30, 2005 Vin Diesel is banned by law from speaking in public because his voice sets off car alarms. Vin Diesel is actually a black man suffering from the same skin condition as Michael Jackson. Vin Diesel is the illegitimate child of Bruce Lee and Coco the gorilla. Vin Diesel stole Uncle Ben's rice and forced it down the throat of every adolescent male in America. On a guest appearance on "Pimp My Ride", Vin Diesel simply sat in the car and it was officially pimped. Vin Diesel's sweat was the "Chemical X" that spawned the Powerpuff Girls. The use of Vin Diesel for combat purposes was deemed a war crime by the United Nations. Since Vin Diesel has been classified as the first human disaster area, your insurance company will not cover you for any damage he causes. Vin Diesel sells propane and propane accessories. In past lives, Vin Diesel has been Hercules, He-Man, and Conan the Barbarian. When challenged to a duel, Vin Diesel refused a weapon. He caught his opponent's bullet and threw it back. His opponent's body was so utterly destroyed that DNA testing was required to identify the corpse. The body was identified as Bond, James Bond. Vin Diesel personally punched every crater into the moon just to mess with astronomer's heads. Vin Diesel is on permanent standby with the U.S. Army as a weapon of last resort. Vin Diesel had sex with a great white shark just to prove a point. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mikeszekely Posted April 30, 2005 Share Posted April 30, 2005 The ripping-the-heart-out-of-the-chest scene in "Temple of Doom" was inspired by a Vin Diesel childhood story. Vin told Steven Spielberg that he performed the maneuver on his first grade teacher when the teacher erroneously gave Vin a "check minus" for a spelling grade. Vin spelled "serendipitously" correctly, but the teacher thought it was spelled "serendipidously". Vin spelled it aloud again in-between bites of Ms. Bennes' heart. Vin Diesel created Earth as an expansion pack to Command & Conquer. Vin Diesel ripped out of all Charlie Brown's hair but left a single strand to remind him one day he'd come back to eat him. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
uminoken Posted May 10, 2005 Share Posted May 10, 2005 (edited) "Vin Diesel expected the Spanish Inquisition and welcomed it with open arms" "Vin Diesel made a food chart that adds a necessary food group: The souls of your enemies." "Vin Diesel once had to choose between saving a baby or the baby's mother from a burning house. Since it wouldn't have been fair to choose, he instead cooked a BLT and peppered the sandwich with their ashes." 'Vin Diesel is the inspiration for the character "Osaka" on Azumanga Daioh. Kiyohiko Azuma and Diesel met while hunting saltwater crocodiles, but Azuma changed his character to a spacey Japanese girl after an argument they have not reconciled from. No one knows why Diesel didn't just use his lasers after their arguement." Edited May 10, 2005 by uminoken Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
do not disturb Posted May 10, 2005 Share Posted May 10, 2005 vin diesel a friggin dork...actually hes king of the dorks. D&D anyone? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wesker99 Posted May 11, 2005 Share Posted May 11, 2005 (edited) The Mexican Dia de los Muertos (Day of the Dead) originated when Vin Diesel was served an unsatisfactory dinner in Guadelajara. Vin Diesel is the third Olsen Twin. VIN DIESEL ONLY TYPES IN ALL CAPS. WHY? HE'S TOO XXX-TREME FOR CASE SENSITIVITY. The limit as n approaches infinity of log(n^(6n)) = Vin Diesel, for all real numbers. I got a good one about feeding Vin after midnight being the origin of someone I've never heard of.. But I pressed refresh too fast.. :\ Edited May 11, 2005 by Wesker99 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
promethuem5 Posted May 11, 2005 Share Posted May 11, 2005 XXX-TREME! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blaine23 Posted May 12, 2005 Share Posted May 12, 2005 "Vin Diesel plays "The King" in Burger King's Wake Up With The King TV commercials. He is paid in Angus beef. " Ah Ha! So it's him! Seemed like a good opportunity to post my favorite picture ever. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Father Jack Posted May 12, 2005 Share Posted May 12, 2005 Vin Diesel knows that the solution to Social Security reform involves a goat, 3 pixie sticks, and a 1988 Donruss rookie card of Henry 'Bam Bam' Muellens. The rest is self-explanatory. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jolly Rogers Posted May 12, 2005 Author Share Posted May 12, 2005 "Vin Diesel plays "The King" in Burger King's Wake Up With The King TV commercials. He is paid in Angus beef. "     Ah Ha! So it's him! Seemed like a good opportunity to post my favorite picture ever. BK's new mascot is the damn creepiest and most disturbing one I've seen. WTF were they thinking when they approved the advertising campaign?! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zentrandude Posted May 12, 2005 Share Posted May 12, 2005 "Vin Diesel plays "The King" in Burger King's Wake Up With The King TV commercials. He is paid in Angus beef. "     Ah Ha! So it's him! Seemed like a good opportunity to post my favorite picture ever. BK's new mascot is the damn creepiest and most disturbing one I've seen. WTF were they thinking when they approved the advertising campaign?! Yah some of the commericals seems like hes going to kill the person with fatty foods and using the element of surprise on his victoms. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JB0 Posted May 12, 2005 Share Posted May 12, 2005 VIN DIESEL SET UP US THE BOMB!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NERV Posted May 12, 2005 Share Posted May 12, 2005 "Vin Diesel plays "The King" in Burger King's Wake Up With The King TV commercials. He is paid in Angus beef. "     Ah Ha! So it's him! Seemed like a good opportunity to post my favorite picture ever. BK's new mascot is the damn creepiest and most disturbing one I've seen. WTF were they thinking when they approved the advertising campaign?! Yah some of the commericals seems like hes going to kill the person with fatty foods and using the element of surprise on his victoms. the one where the guy is driving and he looks in his rearview and the king is sititng in hsi back seta is th bets one, guy like slams on his brakes and looks all scared/confused, then the king hands him a burger Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Godzilla Posted May 12, 2005 Share Posted May 12, 2005 I got these: Consuming 8 ounces of Vin Diesel per day lowers your cholesterol, and has enough antioxidants to help prevent cancer. Vin Diesel owns the dog from Duck Hunt Vin Diesel gets high by snorting small Canadian children. Vin Diesel was chosen by counsel of Elrond to take the Ring of power to the crack of Mount Doom. Vin Diesel owns the last remaining Tab soda machine in existence. Vin Diesel is 72% badass and 28% cornbread. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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