Knight26

I agree DH, the only good the TF30 ever did was back at Aviation Challenge we had one cut up and painted to use a teaching aide to show all the parts of an engine. Suck, Squeeze, bang, twist, blow, blow harder. LOL

It threw a compressor blade, ask DH he knows more about what happened.

http://www.micom.net/oops/

mecha, no, really cool fighters, and space ships, sure but only in 3-D. Heck I have a hard enough time designing tanks, speaking of which I need to call up my tanker buddies and ask them for the design sketches they wanted me to make 3-D for them.

Thanks for the comments guys these are the types of things I really do need to see to make my writing better. I will keep everything said in mind as I progress through the next rewrite. How about this as an idea for the prologue rewrite... I open with someone reading a multimedia report compiled by Jordan Vaughnt, it opens with the openning lines interspersed with video clips. The video clips could have dialogue to help draw the reader in and I will include some more of the "hidden" history that I glossed over in this version, making some vague implications about who is pulling the strings. How does that sound?

aarggh, can't see them at work

Post pictures man, post pictures

I guess in 2010 I will be able to fly into the office: http://www.terrafugia.com/vehicle.htm#images Bigget problem I see with it is the lack of adequate rearward visibility, especially in car mode.

I know the book you are talking about Death Hamner, I have friends who used to work in a bookstore, I really should ask them to check titles for me, lol. As for the CYA, I am actually going to pull down the documents as I think everyone who is goign to read them and give good feedback on here probably has. On the Baen Board though they will provide you with protection automatically, in order to cover their own tales. Yeah and the Matrix thing was a major coup. OF course IMHO the Matrix is one of those stories taht on the surface seems interesting, but the deeper you delve the more illogical it becomes.

That isn't a marine hornet Wolf-X, it;s a superbug and therefore a Navy bird, and it looks like it belongs to VFA-27, a navy squadron.

Man the Eagle is still a cool design.

Thanks for the comments Sundown, I've actually had the present tense / past tense arguement many times, I guess I did it originally as an experimetn just to see what it would be like and kept on doing it. Maybe then I should go back into the more standard past tense telling. About the prologue, I actually write all the prologues as letters or papers by a territiary character. But I guess this one is the only one that doesn't say that right away. Ok, I will put something at the beginning to make it look like the unfinished paper that it is. Maybe just take the last part, with his name and date and put it back at the beginning, with a "working title".

We have a search function for a reason haus

Um F-ZeroOne it is just a regular table with those instrument panel coasters you get at airshows or online. Also nice custom man, any chance it can mount Sparrows or AMRAAMS on the ventral recesses?

Interesting piece, and like Vinnie says most fan fiction is not well recieved around here, and usually for good reason. As for yours, the grammar needs a lot of work as it makes it very distracting to read, you change tenses alot, which really hurts. Also rewriting an existing scene is generally frowned upon, try instead to write it from a different perspective, someone else looking or listenning in. Or as a flashback, of say Hikaru and Misa talking about ti years later and compare how each of them saw it. Hope that helps.

As requested I am attaching a sample from the first book, this is the prologue, and heck the first "chapter": I have removed the documents, if you would like to see them to give feedback PM me.

None taken Phyrox, I think the reason that I kept the I-War title as long as I did was just that when I came up with it, it was the least cheesy of all the titles I pondered and made the most sense. I've kept it for so long just out of, I guess habit. I've written down like a dozen and a half new overarcing titles and none of them really jump out at me much, except mayb "Infinite Space" but even that one doesn't grab me too much. Plus it is the title of math textbook, I looked this time. As for a synopsis. Well the main series follows a special operations rescue team in a future war. That is the short version, basically the war has two major sides, the Universal Confederation of Sentient Beings (UCSB) who are the "good guys" and the Galactic Federation, which is Earth Based, and they are the "bad guys." The real good guys and bad guys will eventually be shown but let us say that there is a lot string pulling going on on both sides. The title for this particular story came about pretty easily, and should be fine. The biggest problem will come from the main series itself, though I may just name the main series after the team the main characters are on. The only problem I see with that is that it could result in a three line title. So the first book's title could easily become: ACADEMY A Blazer Force Adventure In the Infinite Space Universe Or something to that effect. Then again i could just use an overarcing universe title like Infinite Space, but never have it show up in the title, sort of how Larry Niven does it in his Known Space series. I dunno this whole thing has me second guessing, I just got so attached to the Infinity War title that now I am having a hard time letting it go.

Actually the A-10C is just a stopgap to give the old Hog better capabilities while the F-35 comes online, and to supplement the JSF once it does. Curent planning has the A-10 being replaced by STOVL F-35Bs 399656[/snapback] Heh, them wacky military planners. They must be smoking some very funny cigarettes if they really think that the F-35B is really a suitable and capable replacement for the A-10. Graham 399716[/snapback] You took the words right out of my mouth

Yeah I am trying for something that doesn't just scream out cliche or cheese

WTF?

Also on the Stealth subject, Lockheed has developed a devilishly simple method of detecting stealth aircraft. So simple infact, that while I can't go into the details here, that when other countries heard about it htey created their own very quickly. Basically just look for empty air that is moving really really fast. Also, it has long been known, since the 80s if not earlier that older radars could easily detect stealth aircraft. That is one of the major reasons why in the 80s we sold our radars to everybody, sometimes in the hopes taht the russians would copy them and use them. And, the major reason why no F-117s were shot down durign the first Gulf War can be creditted to F-4Gs and A-6Es, which cleared out all the SAM sites along hte F-117s route prior to going into combat. Basically any Iraqi radar or SAM operator was so sure he was going to die when hearing a jet that they turned off their systems.

The problem DA is that the title is taken and copyrighted because of that so I need to find a new one. I did some searching and discovered the Marvel title after I found out about my little mistake.

aarggh. Ok I posted my first short story to the web board. they tore it assunder, which I expected, hey they are editors on there so I actually wanted critiques. What got me though is that they are saying that overall universe title I selected "The Infinity War" is already taken. heck one guy said it was a copyright infringement and to forward it to Marvel, who apparently own the name. Now I for one had never heard of a Marvel Comics series by the name of Infinity War before, so I know that no true copyright infringment occured. However I will ahve to select a new overall title and am coming up short. I'm kind of leaning towards "Infinite Space" sort of take on Larry Niven's Known Space series of books, but am not sure. What do you all think? I would rather not name the series after any one particular group or ship because I do like to branch out and tell side stories. So what do you all think, any thoughts, ideas, advice?

There are no chaff or flare launchers on the F-22 if I can recall Graham, but I think the side mounted missle bays may be big enough to accomodate may be 5 flares or so. I think the F-22 probably uses an active ECM system to prevent missles from homing into it. Besides, the flares and chaff would probably add a little weight to the fighter slightly affecting it's handling. Dave, Nied, or Knight26, feel free to correct me if I'm wrong. Also since I think that one of you guys are pilots like Skull Leader(correct me if I'm wrong) I was just wondering have you ever been to Red Flag Nellis AFB just to see what it's like? I remember yesterday when I was watching Red Flag: Thunder at Nellis on the Military channel and they were explaining how rookie pilots are able to perform a plethora of mission objectives based on alot of mission scenarios as pilots from around the world participate in joint exercises with USAF pilots. For those who wanna know more about RF, here's a link to this years RF program http://milavia.net/specials/redflag06-1/index.htm 399605[/snapback] 0 Phalanx where do you get this stuff? Yes Graham the F-22 does have Chaff and Flare dispensers how else could this picture have been taken? As for the actual location and whether or not they are conceeled behind doors I do not know. However, my educated guess is that they are in the square black panels behind the ventral missile bays. PS I also have a better one of it doing a full flare launch, just not on this computer.

MY fiance' and I in our engagement photo: