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Mega Shark Versus Giant Octopus The Asylum, 2009 Directed by Ace Hannah (a.k.a. Jack Perez, who directed Wild Things 2) Running Time: 90 minutes Rated R for violence, mature situations, profanity and suggestive drug use on the part of The Asylum. Cast Deborah Gibson as Dr. Emma MacNeil Vic Chao as Prof. Seiji Shimada Sean Lawlor as Prof. Lamar Sanders Lorenzo Lamas as Allan Baxter Synopsis When oceanographer Emma MacNeil "borrows" a submarine to study whale migration off the coast of Alaska, a low-frequency sonar device is suddenly dropped by a military helicopter, causing the whales to go berserk and ram a nearby glacier. This incident unearths and awakens a Megalodon (a giant prehistoric shark) and a Giant Octopus from their 10-million-year suspended animation. All hell breaks loose, now that they're awake - whales are found mutilated everywhere, an oil rig in Japan is destroyed by the octopus in seconds and the shark defies physics by eating a 747 from 30,000 feet in the sky. After a failed attempt to corral both sea creatures in Tokyo Bay and San Francisco - resulting in the shark taking a bite out of the Golden Gate Bridge, Emma, along with her mentor Lamar Sanders and Japanese scientist Seiji Shimada, proposes to have the shark and octopus stage their "Thrilla in Manila" and kill each other off before they create any further damage. Lowdown I know what you're thinking: What the hell am I doing reviewing a crappy B-movie? It's not like I've never done that before; after all, I did sit through the sci-fi abomination that is Resiklo. So what could possibly be worse than that? Well, the first indication to this film is that it's produced by The Asylum - the same people who brought us low-budget "mockbusters" like Transmorphers, AVH: Alien vs. Hunter, Snakes on a Train and The Terminators. Not a good start at all, right? Then comes the second indication: the cast. We all know that former soap opera star Lorenzo Lamas is pretty much washed out, but former teen idol Deborah Gibson in the lead role? She must be desperate, as her Playboy stint years ago was a disaster, and I've read that she recently sold her house. In typical B-movie fashion, the acting is atrocious, the storyline is riddled with plot loopholes you can jump your car through, and the CG effects are downright cheesy. So why, then, is Mega Shark vs. Giant Octopus not reviewed as a bad movie? Well, it's simple: it's a movie so bad, it's actually good. The scene where the shark eats a 747 alone saves the whole movie. This film makes a perfect party piece if you're in the mood to laugh at something - whether or not you're smoking a joint on the side. In a nutshell, Mega Shark vs. Giant Octopus is a bad movie that you'd actually want to show your friends. As long as there's enough booze in the house. Rating: B+ (if you're stoned); D+ (for everyone else) Links Official Mega Shark vs. Giant Octopus Homepage References The Internet Movie Database