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frothymug

The Fanfiction Thread

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I've only read up to chapter 9... I haven't had any time to check for updates nor work on my own fic :(

It's been pretty quiet so far, but I see he's taken a couple of my suggestions to heart earlier in the story. :D

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If I wanted to write some Zentradi characters speaking in Zentran, does anyone know how to write that? Or do I just write, "so-and-so swore loudly in Zentran?"

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I think Sketchley's site had a short list of vocabulary words. Might be something worth looking at.

From a writing perspective, I would have to say that it's risky territory. If done right, it will make your story look really good. If done wrong, well... It won't be pretty. It's too bad you can't use a custom that has the Zentraedi alphabet. That certainly would make things a lot easier, since nobody really knows how to pronounce anything and you could basically make up whatever you want and it'd look authentic.

If I had to do something like that, I'd try to avoid it being the forefront of dialogue. Here's a sample of something I might do.

"Excuse me a moment..." he cordially pleaded. He then turned towards his subordinate and engaged in a conversation using their native tongue. Despite the fact that the dialect was unintelligible to most, a sense of urgency and despair flowed from the younger officer; something was indeed
very
wrong. After a short, terse exchange of commands and affirmations, the younger officer scurried away to carry out his new orders. "Sorry about that," he said, returning to his previous amicable demeanor, "Now, where were we?" It was as if nothing had even happened just moments before; the previous conversation with his underling had no effect on him whatsoever.

I guess it depends on how important the dialogue is going to be. I've seen you asking some pretty tough-to-answer questions in the Newbie thread. Any clues as to what you're working on?

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What can I say, I'm a details man. I suppose it comes from being an old Star Wars fan, where the EU and the wikis have exhaustive amounts of information.

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Our problem with Macross is that it's not native to English and is subject to mistranslation. If it's not outright denied by official material, I say go ahead and make up whatever you'd like... within reason, of course.

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I use actual Zentraedi in my fic, but I'm essentially paraphrasing dialog that fans will decipher no problem. I say you go with the technique laid out by Frothy -- show us the emotional content of the conversation, if not the literal content, you know?

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If I wanted to write some Zentradi characters speaking in Zentran, does anyone know how to write that? Or do I just write, "so-and-so swore loudly in Zentran?"

I prefer this way (in the same way I treat how foreign languages are spoken):

Smarting, Klan wasn't going to be called that way, so in her native tongue (still unintelligible to most but the learned Microns who knew every verb and pronunciation) she whispered, "Michael... You ain't seen nothing yet!"

In most of my writings, and as I have an English-speaking audience who don't want to be bothered about picking up a dictionary while reading, I rarely use Japanese words, so I would apply the same practice to the Zentrans' language.

Edited by soul.assassin

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When I started my fanfic, I had strongly considered using honorifics, but wisely decided against it. I think it's one of those rules of thumb when doing fanfic based on anime. I find myself giving the existing characters and my OC's more American traits and mannerisms. It's too bad it isn't a movie where you can just put subtitles on it. ;)

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one also has to ask "whose scene is this?" In my fic, none of the protagonists speak nor understand Zentraedi, so the dialog remains a mystery to them.

You can also think about it in legal terms. You can ask a witness whether a conversation occurred, but the content may very well be hearsay. So the question is, are we hearing about the conversation to establish whether it occurred or to establish what specifically is said in that conversation. If we need the literal content, then you should likely translate the dialog into the reader's native language. If you only need the feel, you can either use the foreign dialect or just describe the conversation. I'm not sure that there's a complete enough Zentraedi to Japanese or English dictionary out there to create much dialog besides what we've already heard in the context of... wow... 30 years of Macross. It's not like Klingon or Na'vi or Elvish or these languages which are largely defined and developed or even created with linguistic experts. Although, it might be nice if somebody had blessings to create such a thing. Still, it seems like the roots of Zentraedi would be protoculture, and I feel like they're still making that stuff up as they go.

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http://io9.com/5896488/10-secrets-to-creating-unforgettable-supporting-characters?tag=daily-10

Here's an article about creating supporting characters that I think also touches on some broader concepts of writing more alive, believable worlds. In a way most of these tips or tricks or secrets are not really secrets at all, but given that a lot of fan fiction is written by people with no formal training in literature, and indeed, often by people that don't even read much literature, I think it's important we take these things into the fanfic community.

Your mileage may vary.

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I've been completely buried in schoolwork all semester, plus I've been in a relationship for the past few months and all of my free time is dedicated to her ;)

I'll read it when I get a chance. Hopefully, things will quiet down a bit as I near finals week next month. I'll have a three-week break before summer classes start, too.

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Here's the first chapter of my Haruhi Suzumiya fanfiction "The Aimless Wanderings of Haruhi Suzumiya." This is a text story illustrated with still photography featuring my Figma figures (and a couple of surprises):

http://www.dyrl.pl/detale.html?id=1312

Enjoy!

Pete

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Nice idea! It's too bad I've never seen Haruhi Suzumiya, so I have no idea what's going on :p

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Here's the first chapter of my Haruhi Suzumiya fanfiction "The Aimless Wanderings of Haruhi Suzumiya." This is a text story illustrated with still photography featuring my Figma figures (and a couple of surprises):

http://www.dyrl.pl/detale.html?id=1312

Enjoy!

Pete

Since I don't know anything about Haruhi, I'm going to sumarize this as best as I can: Crazy, reality-challenged, Highschool kids go on a quest to find the Macross? Ah hell, why not? :D

Also, I'm getting worried about the guy who writes "Wings of the Fairy." I don't think he (or she) has updated in about three months.

So I was talking about things with some guys on the Gundamn!@MAHQ FB group and crossovers and Macross came up. Then I got to thinking about Star Wars. That little lightbulb went off on my head. I went hunting and found this:

skull_squadron_x_wing_insignia_by_viperaviator-d4ewe48.png

It gives me ideas. :)

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As soon as I get control over my hectic schedule again, I'll shoot Lancel another message on FF.net. I checked in with him a couple of months ago and we briefly exchanged messages, but he didn't say whether or not he was going to continue. Coincidentally, he asked me if I was going to update soon... of course, I couldn't answer with any kind of certainty.

I've got to keep on top of my homework if I want to keep my GPA above a certain point. I have less than two weeks left in the semester, then exams, and then a three-week break before summer classes start. I'm looking for a new place to live and trying to sell my car. I hope I'll have some time to get something done soon. I'm sure most of my subscribers have abandoned all hope by now...

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Oh, good!

As it turns out, I actually have most of the day today to myself. I'll try to get some writing done. My next chapter has been half-done for months now, but I've been too busy to finish it.

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Is this supposed to be some epic crossover story? I really am not familiar with most of these characters, so maybe I'm just not able to enjoy it on the same level... I just vaguely know what shows they come from.

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Is this supposed to be some epic crossover story? I really am not familiar with most of these characters, so maybe I'm just not able to enjoy it on the same level... I just vaguely know what shows they come from.

Well - I hope it's worthy of being called an "epic cross over" :-)

The previous 4 chapters are here:

http://www.dyrl.pl/kategorie.html?cat_id=224

I have tried to write the story in such a way that even without watching the anime it's based on, readers will be able to eventually get a good idea of what the characters are all about. Act II focused a bit on the back story of Haruhi Suzumiya, but generally I hope you don't have to watch the anime to enjoy the comic :-)

Pete

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I'm up to something new. Check it out.

377203_454992514546088_624457602_n.jpg

MACROSS EFFECT

A Macross/Mass Effect crossover

Prologue

Recent History

In the year 1999 AD an alien spaceship crash-landed on Earth and forever changed the fate of the human race. The new United Nations Government quickly began rebuilding the ship and plumbing the secrets of its construction. This paid off ten years later when aliens known as the zentradi entered the solar system searching for the lost ship. Unfortunately, computer systems on the newly named SDF-1 Macross opened fire on the zentradi and ignited humanity’s first interstellar war. In a desperate attempt to lead the aliens away from Earth, the Macross attempted a space fold and ended up near Pluto, where they discovered how the zentradi had entered the Solar System. What was once thought to be Charon, a moon of Pluto, turned out to be a device that was identified as a Super Dimension Relay. Unable to examine the device in detail, the Macross then began to make its way back to Earth.

In March 2010 the war was brought to end, largely thanks to the crew of the Macross who were able to bridge the gap between human and Zentradi. During the period of reconstruction that followed, the reorganized UN government determined that best way to protect humanity from the threat of extinction would be to spread itself out among the stars. This Space Emigration Plan was finalized in September 2011 and the following September the first of the long-range colony ships, the SDF-2 Megaroad-01 was launched from Macross City, Alaska. Thereafter the UN Spacy (United Nations Space Navy) would launch one or two Megaroad ships every year.

The plan suffered both success and failure. Onboard the Megaroad-01 were Space War One heroes Captain Misa Hayase Ichijo, her husband Valkyrie ace Hikaru Ichijo and songstress Lynn Minmay and soon after the Megaroad-01 departed Earth, the planet Eden was discovered and colonized. Due to its proximity to Earth, it quickly became the second most populated planet in the UNG. Soon afterwards, the Megaroad-01 encountered a race of aliens known as the turians as it attempted to reactivate a dormant Super Dimension Relay. The turians belonged to a collective of races called the Citadel Council, and it was against their laws to reactivate dormant relays. Instead of negotiating, the turians opened fire but thanks to the heroic efforts of Hikaru and his Skull Squadron and the Megaroad-01’s escorts, they were not destroyed. Although the incident threatened to ignite another war, the Megaroad-01 followed the relays to the Citadel and opened up diplomatic relations with the Citadel. Not long after this, humanity and zentradi were welcomed into Citadel space.

Despite this rocky start, the seeds of humanity slowly began to spread throughout the galaxy, alongside their zentradi brethren. In September 2030, the first of the New Macross-class colony ships entered service. Capable of carrying millions of colonists instead of the thousands that the Megaroad ships could, the New Macross-class quickly became the cornerstone of the colonization efforts. Arguably one of the most famous of these fleets was the Macross 7, commanded by another legendary war hero, Maximillian Jenius. In 2045 they encountered a race of mysterious beings known as the Protodeviln that threatened not only the Macross 7 fleet but possibly the entire known galaxy. Thanks to the actions of Macross 7 resident and rock musician Basara Nekki, the Protodeviln returned to the dimension they had come from, never to threaten the galaxy again.

Humanity and zentradi alike continued to march onwards through the wilds of the galaxy. This expansion didn’t come without cost however. Humanity had mostly moved out into the areas of the galaxy identified by the Council as the Skyllian Verge and the Attican Traverse. This region was being developed by a race called the batarians, members of the Citadel and they were highly resentful of the intrusion. They attempted to petition the Council to declare the area a “zone of batarian interest.” The Council said that the humans had as much right to be there as they did. Because of this, the batarians cut off all contact and closed their embassy. Human colonies began to come under attack by batarian-funded pirate gangs and slavers, the worst incident of which was the raid on the colony of Mindoir. Horrified by the atrocities inflicted at Mindoir, UN Spacy conducted several assaults against pirate and slaver bases, culminating in the Siege of Torfan. This extended campaign fully illustrated UN Spacy’s combined human/zentradi war-fighting capabilities and while it impressed, and in some cases unsettled, many Council worlds, it led to humans and zentradi earning the everlasting hatred of the batarians.

The UNG also faced its own internal problems. In 2040, in what became known as the Sharon Apple Incident, several high-ranking UN Spacy officers conspired with scientists of the Macross Consortium and created not only an AI network for virtual singing idol Sharon Apple, but also one for the prototype Ghost X-9 unmanned fighter. This was against Council law, but when Sharon went off the deep end during a concert for the thirtieth anniversary of the armistice between UN Spacy and the zentradi, two test pilots from the New Edwards base on planet Eden flying the YF-19 and YF-21 prototypes from the Project: Supernova Advanced Variable Fighter competition, engaged both the X-9 and Sharon Apple, who had hypnotized the inhabitants of Macross City, Alaska with high frequency sound and holograms. Both the X-9 and Sharon were destroyed, the conspirators rooted out. However, the UNG still faced heavy sanctions from the Citadel; scars from the Geth rebellion against the quarians in 1900 AD were still felt.

In 2051, a certain UN Spacy admiral orchestrated a plot to force the military into a confrontation with the batarians. Secretly organizing a terrorist force known as Vindirance, he set them against several batarian worlds. Fortunately, before the batarians could declare war, UN Spacy’s special operations unit, VF-X Ravens, tracked the terrorists back to the admiral who then commandeered the Battle-class space stealth attack carrier Battle 13 and took it towards the batarian home world, Kar’Shan. The Ravens, their carrier Saratoga and the Macross-class SDFN-7 Enterprise pursued and were able to destroy Battle 13 before it could attack Kar’Shan. This incident, coupled with many cases of social unrest across UNG space led to the reformation of the United Nations Government into the New UNG and the UN Spacy into the New UN Spacy (N.U.N.S.).

In 2059, the Macross Frontier fleet (Macross 25) encountered the alien race known as the Vajra. An insectoid, super-dimensional life form, the Vajra aggressively attacked the Frontier fleet, just as they had done the Council centuries before. The Vajra Wars had nearly led to the toppling of Council space and it had taken the uplifting of the krogan to finally turn the tide. Frontier fought back until it was learned that a conspiracy from the Macross Galaxy fleet (Mac21) was intending to use the Vajra to basically take over the minds of all living beings in the universe. Fortunately members of the private military company Strategic Military Services discovered the source of the conspiracy and in an epic battle over the new Vajra home world, which included a surprise backup fleet made up of UN Spacy, zentradi, SMS, turian, asari and salarian ships, the Galaxy conspirators were defeated, the Battle Galaxy carrier was destroyed and the Vajra disappeared.

The year is now 2063. Some of the social unrest that prompted the development of the New UN Spacy and the reorganization of the United Government still persists. Humans and zentradi are respected, feared and derided in almost equal measures as they continue to push to have a greater role in galactic politics. There are still rogue zentradi fleets roaming the dark corners of the galaxy and other threats may lay hidden in the galactic reaches that humanity and its allies have yet to explore. Now, in an attempt to earn more legitimacy from the Council, NUNS is pushing for elite soldiers to become part of the Citadel’s SPECial Tactics and REconnaissance operatives. The Spectres.

-Macross Effect-

“Well, what about Shepard? He’s a spacer, been raised on all sorts of ships since he was young.”

“He was assigned to Eden when the Blitz occurred. Rallied the defenders and struck back at the invaders, helping to hold them long enough so that the UN Spacy forces could arrive.”

“A bona-fide war hero. We couldn’t ask for a better candidate.”

“Is that the kind of person we want protecting the galaxy?”

“That’s the only kind who can.”

“We can’t question his courage.”

“I’ll make the call.”

Edited by VF-15 Banshee

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I scanned through it really fast, since I am unfamiliar with the Mass Effect games (Is that what that "N7" thing is? I keep seeing it around, but don't know what it means). I don't really know what's new and what's Mass Effect stuff, so it's tough for me to even know what's going on. I did notice that there were some names of what appeared to be other races not capitalized. Is this intentional?

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Funnily enough, this story seems to be getting the exact opposite response that the original version, Gundam 00ME, did. That is to say, a very negative response.

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I recently played the first two Mass Effect games and loved the universe and characters so I'll definitely check this out. Expect feedback soon.

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I much prefer stuff within a defined universe over crossovers. They're just not really my cup of tea.

Says the guy who has a music video featuring Valks, Megatron, Cylons, Kilrathi, the Millennium Falcon...

Haha, I meant in fanfic.

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Well, I managed to sit my ass down the other day and get a bit of work done on my next chapter. I haven't updated in almost a year, but I am still determined to finish this thing eventually. I've had over half of the chapter done since last year, and just haven't had the spare time nor desire to finish it. Now, I've been feeling the urge to get back on it and I'm almost done with it. I need to know if one of you guys can proofread for me. Chilly, you were an invaluable source of input for the last couple of chapters I'd posted. I'm sure Banshee would be interested too, so let me know if you guys will be able to spare some time for me sometime in the next couple of weeks, whenever I manage to wrap it up.

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Next Act of my fanfic photo-comic is online here:

http://www.dyrl.pl/detale.html?id=1439

I don't have the time or the resources I once had to put into these, so I get a sense of them being kind of lackluster...But my hope is that eventually I will get into the swing of things and, kind of like Transformers comics had peaks and throughs - so my comics will also eventually have their peaks... :-)

Pete

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