I am a dynamic figure, often seen scaling walls and racing cars. I have been known to remodel electric vehicles on my lunch breaks, making them more efficient in the area of energy retention. I translate random technical jargon for Macross fans. I write profane drinking songs. I manage time efficiently. Occasionally, I tread water for three days in a row.
I woo women with my sensuous and godlike trombone playing. I can pilot bicycles up severe inclines with unflagging speed, and I cook thirty-minute brownies in twenty minutes. I am an expert in model-building, a veteran in love, and persona non grata in northern Minnesota.
Using only a twisted wire harness and a large bag of chocolates, I once single-handedly saved the company from a multimillion dollar recall campaign. I play bluegrass cello. I am the subject of numerous documentaries. When bored, I build large traction trebuchets in my yard. I enjoy urban hang-gliding. On the holidays, I repair computers free of charge.
I am an abstract artist, a concrete analyst, and a ruthless bookie. Critics worldwide swoon over my original line of tartan lingerie. I don't perspire. I am a private citizen, yet I receive fan mail. Last summer, I toured Death Valley with a traveling band of mad scientists and their coolant leak demonstrator. My deft floral arrangements earned me fame in international botany circles. Children and small animals trust me.
I can hurl screwdrivers at small, moving objects with deadly accuracy. I once read Paradise Lost, Moby Dick, and David Copperfield in one day and still had time to refurbish an entire dining room that evening. I have performed several covert operations for the CIA. I sleep once a week. When I do sleep, I sleep in a chair. While on vacation in Canada, I successfully negotiated with a group of terrorists who had seized a small bakery. The laws of physics do not apply to me.
I balance, I weave, I dodge, I frolic, and my bills are all paid. On weekends, to let off steam, I participate in full-contact origami. Years ago, I discovered the meaning of life but forgot to write it down. I have made extraordinary four-course meals using only mouli and a toaster oven. I breed prize-winning snakes. I have won races in Michigan, Tae Kwon Do competitions in Canada, and trivia contests on the floor of Congress. I have played Hamlet, I have performed open heart surgery, and I have spoken with Elvis... but I have not yet figured out why people liked Macross 7.
Bonus: There is at least one true statement in every one of those paragraphs... good luck!
The handle I go by here, and on most other fan sites, is Seto Kaiba. Among other things, I'm known as one of the resident experts on Macross II: Lovers Again and the parallel universe to which it belongs. Over the past few years, I've become part of Mr March's Macross Mecha Manual project, providing the site's web hosting, tracking down old and rare books for him to work his artistic magic on, and supplying translations and technical consultation that helps update the site's many articles. Thanks to all that, my collection is growing at an alarming rate and annexing ever-increasing amounts of shelf space in my study.
For his part, Mr March has gotten me into the hobby of toy collecting by helping me get my hands on a DX YF-30 Chronos... which my wallet my never forgive him for. ;-)
I'm always happy to help fans of Macross (or Robotech) find answers to their questions about the shows, or just point them in the right direction for things like importing art books, figurines, apparel, or just finding some quality fansubs.